Thursday, April 02, 2015

The Fruit of the Gods.

Who SAYS I can't write fantasy fables? Here's a little story I wrote today. I am so pleased that my writing brain is working again! This story is called:

The Fruit of the Gods.

Once upon a time there was a wonderful forest garden in the Great Rift Valley of Africa. The garden was called Eden and the whole area was full of marvelous fruits and other foods like roots and shoots and leaves and mushrooms and green herbs.
The monkeys and the apes lived there very happily and amongst their number were two apes who were a bit different. One was a man called Adam and, who knows, maybe he was even the FIRST man. The other was a woman called Eve and, who knows, maybe she was the FIRST woman. Anyway, they were different to the other apes and monkeys and they liked to talk to the Gods.
The Gods were the local higher beings who knew stuff.
They knew all kinds of stuff like how to throw thunderbolts and how to make things and use tools and know the difference between good and bad and all those important sort of things.
The Gods were the ones who made the wonderful forest garden and all the kinds of food.
One day the Gods were walking about in the forest. There was Yahweh and his wife Asherah, there was El and Ba'al and Enki and Isis, there was Horus and Ra and Osiris and Zeus and Hera and Apollo and Artemis and Hecate and Brahma and Vishnu and Shiva and Odin and Thor and all the big name Gods and they were taking a walk in the beautiful forest they had made.
Soon they happened to meet Adam and Eve.
"Hey there Adam!" said Yahweh, "How's it going Eve?"
"Good," said Adam and Eve together, "it's going good, God."
"What are you up to today?" asked Yahweh's beautiful wife Asherah.
"Were enjoying the fruits of the garden thank you Goddess" was Adam and Eve's reply.
"Oh, OK then," said Yahweh, "But be careful not to eat of the Fig trees in the centre of the garden. Those ones are special God trees, only for us Gods."
"Oh my goodness!" said Adam.
"We didn't realise!" said Eve.
"We will be very careful not to eat from the Fig trees then" said Adam and Eve together, and they meant it most truly because they didn't want to offend the Gods.
When Adam and Eve had made their respectful goodbyes to all the Gods they continued walking on through the forest and took a detour to avoid the place where the Fig trees grew.
As they turned away from the Fig area they saw the Trickster God coming along towards them. He was in his serpent form but they always recognised him no matter which shape he chose to put on. Sometimes he would come as a serpent, sometimes as a spider, often as a coyote or a raven. He liked to dress up in different shapes, just for fun.
"Good morning Mr. Trickster!" said Adam and Eve together.
"Good morning Adam, good morning Eve!" replied the Trickster God "Aren't you going to the Fig tree grove?"
"No sir," replied Eve "We have been told by Yahweh and the other Gods that we mustn't eat the special God food."
"Oh, you don't want to worry about that," said the Trickster "Yahweh and those others are just in a grumpy mood. I'm a God too and I say it's alright for you to have some of the Figs."
"Oh, but isn't it a special God food that we can't eat?" asked Adam.
"Well, yes and no," said the Serpent "It is true that the Fig has special powers, but you can eat it though. All that will happen is it will make you know stuff, just like us Gods know stuff."
"Oh, thank you for telling us" said Eve, "Maybe we will try some after all."
"Yes," said Adam, "It sounds really good, to know stuff I mean."
They said goodbye to the Trickster God and He wished them well. Then they went into the sacred grove and picked some Figs.
As soon as they had both tasted the Figs Adam and Eve became startled.
"Oh!" cried Adam "Fashion disaster! We don't have clothes!"
"Oh!" cried Eve "How gauche! We don't have a style!"
They quickly grabbed some Fig leaves and fashioned them into something stylish.
"Suddenly I know all kinds of things!" said Adam, "Like how to throw thunderbolts, how to make fire and use tools!"
"Me too!" exclaimed Eve, "I know how to mix a martini and repair a tractor!"
"At the same time?" cried Adam, incredulous.
"Oh yes." replied Eve, "I'm very good, you know."
They walked along, proudly wearing their new stylish leaves and chatting about all the things they suddenly knew.
"I wonder why the Fig is special fruit amongst all the others?" said Adam.
"Maybe because it's a Fig-ment." suggested Eve, "Ment like in ment-al processes? Like it jogs the brain cells and gets the figments of the imagination working, maybe?"
"I like it." said Adam, "You've just invented clever wordplay or something."
Before long they bumped into Yahweh and the other Gods again.
"Didn't we tell you not eat Figs?" demanded God, angrily.
"Umm, well, er, God said it was OK." explained Adam, "The other God I mean, the Trickster God."
"Oh." said lovely Asherah, "And didn't the name Trickster give you any clue about His trustworthyness?"
"Well we know NOW." said Eve, sarcastly shrugging and giving a knowing look to Adam."
"You're in trouble now!" interjected Vishnu.
"Yes, yes, alright, I'm handling this." said Yahweh, testily.
Adam and Eve looked a bit worried, as you can imagine.
"From now on," decided Yahweh, "You are both OUT of this lovely forest garden." He waved his Godly hand. "Out you go! From now on you'll have to use your new knowledge to fend for yourselves put there in the wild lands!"
The decision was thus made.
Adam and Eve were forced to wander the world outside of Eden.
As they trudged along the road out of Eden, shoulders slumped and looking fed up, Eve happened to glance back at the garden and saw Yahweh and the Trickster God shaking hands and winking at each other.

THE END (but not really)

(Creative Commons copyright applies. If you repost my story give me the credit as writer. Thanks.)

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